Throughout my career life, I lived in Africa, where I'm still living, where conditions of life varied from those at home. I came to Africa, after I got married. When I got married I had to drop my work in India. When I worked in India, my colleagues and myself, stayed together in one house. We cooked and completed cooking and other home chores together, in turn, and life was very balanced. Less responsibilities, more freedom, that was for the spinsters.. But for those among us who were married, didn't seem life as balancing as it was for us, for they were always saddened by missing of their family members-husband and children.
After marriage, I came to Africa, and for some time, I stayed at home until my appointment was sorted out. During that time, I was able to manage my home chores and reading. Then I got the job and our child was born, oh things were hotting up. I began to get often a kind of panic attack even before I started working, when I imagined how I was going to manage everything alone. Never before, I felt the sense of loss about my home, at that deep level.
And in the initial days of my work, the attack continued haunting me. But the experiences in the coming days had proved, my fears and panic were really out of place. We lived in the campus and my colleagues were extremely kind and inclined to understanding our fears that emanated out of staying away from home. They allowed us to make necessary adjustments in my husband's and my timetable that one of us could always stay at home. And, they also helped us to find the most able and skilled house maids who was able to give the tenderest care to our baby.
Gradually, there came a time, when I began to wonder whether I would have got that much care and kindness, from my colleagues and home members, had I stayed in India. The situation at our homes are changing far beyond what we can think off, or what they were once.
Though we have moved away from that place in a short while, where ever we had worked, we were getting that kind of care from our colleagues, at varying levels. Yet, I cannot say, life-work sea-saw was always balanced.
Honestly, speaking, I can say, it was ever balanced. In my case, I learned as time went on, to accept the imbalances as a part of life. The work/responsibilities had taken various forms and levels. Similarly, as children started growing up, they needed a lot of attention and care, especially because they were living in a multi-cultural atmosphere, very different from what I had known to be mine.
All all those times, as I said above, a complete balance wasn't possible, but I always accepted the imbalances as part of my life.
This post is linked to # Friday Reflection